“You can choose courage or you can choose comfort. You cannot have both.”

~ Brené Brown

There’s something quietly seductive about the comfort zone. It’s predictable. It’s familiar. It rarely asks much of us. But over time, it becomes a gilded cage—safe, yes, but limiting. And if you’re anything like me, you’ve probably had moments when you sensed something more was waiting—just beyond the edge of ease.

Brené Brown’s quote struck me the first time I read it, not because it was brand new, but because it named what I’d lived. You can choose courage, or you can choose comfort. But not both.

Let me tell you what I’ve learned from choosing courage—and why it’s worth it.

The Illusion of Safety

For years, I thrived in my routines. I had a successful career, a clear schedule, and familiar expectations. From the outside, everything appeared to be in order. But inside, something had stalled. It wasn’t burnout. It wasn’t a crisis. It was discontent. I had stopped growing.

And I nearly missed it—because nothing was technically wrong. That’s the trap of comfort. It doesn’t shout. It whispers.

But deep down, I knew that staying there too long would slowly cost me the kind of life I wanted to live—one marked by purpose, impact, and authenticity.

The Cost of Comfort

Choosing comfort comes with a price—stagnation, missed opportunities, and a gradual shrinking of what you believe is possible. When you only do what you’ve always done, you only become what you already are.

Eventually, I realized that the price of staying in place was higher than the risk of moving forward.

So I stepped out. Not all at once—but enough to feel the ground shift.

And that’s when everything began to change.

Choosing Courage, One Step at a Time

Courage doesn’t always feel like a battle cry. Sometimes it feels like sending the email, having the hard conversation, or saying yes to the thing that scares you. Sometimes it feels like showing up when you don’t feel ready.

Here are five practices that helped me choose courage when comfort called louder:

1. Ask “What do I want to be true?”

I’ve used this question repeatedly in my life. It cuts through the noise. If you want a life of meaning, impact, or freedom, you have to name it first. Then ask: What would I need to do today to begin making that true?

The answer often lies outside your comfort zone.

2. Do one brave thing a day

This doesn’t need to be grand. One of the most transformative things I ever did was commit to doing something that stretched me every day—just a little. A phone call. A pitch. A new project. Even trying something I thought I wasn’t “ready” for.

Small acts of courage create powerful momentum.

3. Let discomfort be a sign of growth, not danger

We’re wired to avoid discomfort, but that wiring is outdated. In modern life, discomfort is often a sign that we’re expanding. Learning. Risking. Moving. When I started viewing discomfort as a signal that I was on the right path, I stopped retreating and started leaning in.

4. Surround yourself with brave people

Courage is contagious. Spend time with people who are also choosing growth over comfort. It could be a mastermind group, a coach, or just one friend who dares greatly. 

Their energy will help lift your own.

5. Reflect on what you’ve already survived

You’ve made it through tough moments before. You’ve had hard conversations, taken leaps, navigated change. You’re still here. Every time you chose courage in the past, you proved something to yourself. Don’t forget that.

The Magic Happens Beyond the Familiar

I won’t sugarcoat it—leaving your comfort zone can feel terrifying. But it’s also the only way to create a life that feels fully yours.

When I look back, the most meaningful moments in my life—writing books, launching new work, having deeper relationships—all came after I chose courage. None of them felt safe at the start. But all of them expanded what I believed was possible.

And that’s the reward. When you choose courage, you get your life back. Not the life that’s expected of you—but the one that’s waiting for you.

Final Thoughts: You Can’t Have Both

If you’re standing at a crossroads today—unsure whether to stay where it’s safe or step toward what’s next—remember Brené’s words.

You can choose courage, or you can choose comfort.

But not both.

And if the life you truly want lies outside of what’s familiar… I hope you’ll be brave enough to go get it.

You won’t be alone. I’m right there with you.s